Man doesn't understand the meaning of laptop.

People in drive thru buy coffee for car behind them.

More Will it Blend goodness.

Time Person of the Year according to the Fark community.

A gastronomic recipe just in time for the holidays.

Beer for thought.

Paula Deen chugs melted butter. Yes, that really is the Food Network's very own Paula Deen.

Football 101.

Guide to geeks.

Bad Fashion.

Sleeping on the job.

Perfect timing.

Mobile messaging.

Student Sub.

Decorative beer cans.

The look of love.

Best page in the universe.

Mayor goes mental.

Study shows people are ready to make changes to lifestyles as long as they don't make the change.

Fiji for dogs.

Fourm flamers illustrated guide.

South Korea rolls out women only subway cars.

Weirdest items pawned.

1. Give away something other than candy. (breath mints, golf balls, Neil Diamond concert tickets, etc.)
2. Ask why they aren’t wearing a costume.
3. Fill a briefcase with paper. Slap a sticker on that says, "Top Secret". When trick-or-treaters ring the doorbell, open the door really fast and say, "It's about time you got here Number Six," then, give them the briefcase, and quickly shut the door.
4. Have them sign a waiver before giving them candy.
5. Get trick-or-treaters to come in and fix your dishwasher. Say it‘s making "whirring" sounds and leaking”.
6. After you give them candy, hand the trick-or-treaters a bill.
7. Open the door dressed as a Richard Simons and say “Candy will only make you fat! Besides, who wants candy when we can Jazzersise!?” Commence Jazzersising. Encourage trick-or-treaters to join in by saying “Come on everybody!”
8. When you answer the door, get a handful of M&M‘s, pretend your angry, throw them on the ground, and shout, "Here‘s your candy!"
9. When you answer the door for kids dressed in “scary costumes” look at them as if you’re really scared, grab your chest, clutch the doorknob, let out a shriek, slam the door and pretend to call 911 on your cell phone while clutching a knife, looking around frightfully as you run around the house locking all the doors and windows.
10. When trick-or-treaters come to your door and say “trick-or-treat” respond, “Trick-or-treat? Hmm….that‘s a tough one. I’m gonna pick trick.” Then insist they do a magic trick for you. Tell them they are scammer’s when they explain you’re supposed to give them candy. Then insist you don’t accept solicitor’s and shut the door.
11. Hand out rotten Easter eggs from last year saying it’s the only thing you have to give away and they’ll eventually get used to the smell.
12. Get a catapult. Set it on your porch and lob pumpkins at anyone who comes near your house. Come out dressed like a hillbilly and yell “Get off mah property! No trespassin’!”
13. When trick-or-treaters ring the dorrbell, jump out a nearby window, crashing through the glass, and run as far away from your house as you can, yelling “It’s gonna blow! Save yourselves!” Or for a more dramatic effect wait in your garage with your car running, crash your car through the garage door and speed in reverse down the driveway yelling, “Oh no! They found me!” Speed off down the street.
14. Answer the door dressed as a Margaret Perrin. Promptly have a nervous break down when you see trick-or-treaters and shout, “You’re dark sided too! I don’t want any dark sided… anything anywhere near my house!! Get out of my house!” When the trick-o-treaters flee, stand in the doorway, look around at the Halloween festivities and yell at everyone “Slagon’s!…dragon’s!…everything's dark sided!!!”
15. Answer the door and say, “There you are. I was beginning to thinking you garbage men forgot today is pick up day,” commence emptying garbage into trick-or-treat bags.
16. Tell them their supposed to give you candy.
17. Answer the door with a mouthful of Skittles and several half-eaten candy bars in your hands. Say, “Yeah, what is it?… Oh…uh oh.” Then slam the door and turn off the lights to pretend your not home. If they knock on the door, yell, “Go away nobody’s here!” while you scarf down candy. If they continue to knock on the door just eat faster.
18. Hand out Pepcid AC with your candy explaining the only candy you have is from 1987 and they may “need it later.”
19. Instead of playing scary sound effects play something a hundred times more frightful; Kenny G’s Greatest Hits.
20. Answer the door with a butler and say “Jeeves, release the hounds.” in an ominous tone.


Just to be fair to those who may still trick-o-treat here’s:


1. You and a friend dress up as agents from the Department of Homeland. Security when people answer the door say” I’m agent Smith and this is agent Burnett. We’d like to talk to you for a moment.”

2. When someone compliments you on your costume say “ Oh, this isn’t a costume.”

3. If you’re a parent taking your kids trick-o-treating and you encounter houses which are decorated to look haunted, tell your kids to “wait on the sidewalk” and tell them it’s too “dangerous to get the candy themselves.” Approach the house cautiously and when someone comes to the door and turns porch light on bound down the steps in terror and tell you child to “run for their life!”

4. When someone answers the door say “Oh… you moved into this old house…” When they ask “Yeah… why?” Just say, “oh nothing…”

5. Ask them is this “where the yard sale is and if so does the candy comes with the bowl too?”

Bobby Knight coaches little league.

Plastic bag crackdown.

Undiscovered comics.

Pumpkins take to the air.

You decide.

Rejected motivational posters.

Getting paid to play video games.

Article finds men on average spend $12,000 per year on relationships.

This list may come in handy if you're planning to move to another city.

A South Carolina student was expelled for bringing a butter knife to school. Ralph Wiggum not available for comment.

Japanese street object camouflage. How Not To Be Seen training video sold separately.

5 mile walk to work everyday. Uphill and downhill.

4 Hour Commute from Philly to New York

Let's hope their on steady ground with eachother.

A bibliophiles dream bookcase.

No.

Some British travelers are skipping the plane and travel by Zeppelin to their destination.

Dumb laws from the olden' days.

Funny test answers.

A Coke deliveryman fights with a Pepsi deliveryman over which one is better.

These trick-or-treaters are likely to get extra candy.

Is there a class war being waged between the affluent and the wealthy?

Pac man marks a gaming era milestone.

Can one man make an IMAX movie in his basement?

Researchers reach inconclusive answer.

Man faces 30 years for stealing doughnut. Homer Simpson suspected as partner in crime.

The Big Apple goes SimCity.

Browse through True Facts and wow you're freinds at parties.

The world's first electric sportscar.

Woman steals car to visit her boyfriend in jail. Birds of a feather flock together.

Advertising slogans getting lost in translation and international marketing mess ups.

More coffee foam art.

3D Chalk drawing by Julian Beever.

Woman goes ninja on kids. Uma Thurman not available for comment.

Stay up with the latest amusing and interesting images at streetviewspy.com

Another oldie but goodie.

Drunk driver crashes into police car.

Lost balloon travels from England to China.

Photos and video of the incident. Related news: Hammerheads becoming extinct.

Going 11 mph over the speed limit cost this man over $200,000.

Guess he didn't get the memo.



Back story for those who don't know: YouTube video producers met together in Washington Square Park in NYC 7/7/07.

Today in weird news, Iranian president visits New York and gives speech at Columbia University. Speech met with boo's. NY Times cartoonist sums up America's feelings.

E.T. phones home. I don't think the moon is in most coverage plans.

P. Allen Smith does not approve.

False tooth robbery. Tooth fairy not available for comment.

Iowa man uses Onion in assault against wife.

Powerful punctuation.

Take a trip back in time via the Way Back Machine.

Paris by night.

A collection of funny, quirky bumper stickers.

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How to write a paper for college. Remember not to procrastinate.

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This is why.

51 Text Effect Tutorials Every Designer Should See.

500 years morphed into 2:52.

The day in the life of a Toronto ferry.

Translate English to Instant Messenger language. Now if only there was one that would translate it the other way around.

What does a the inside of a supermarket look like from above?

The Monticello Dam located in Northern California has a giant funnel shaped outlet which allows water to bypass the dam when it reaches maximum capacity.


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The world at night seen from space.

What to do in an emergency. An oldie but a goodie.

A four year old girl in Britain was asked to put her hoodie down because the owner said it posed a security threat to his arcade. Jack Bauer unavailable for comment. Common sense missing.

M.C. Esher's Relativity done in Lego's.

An amazing story about a man creating mosaics out of nothing more than toothpicks.

Nobody likes getting error messages, but everyone (well almost everyone) likes fake error messages.

Dramatic Prairie Dog is sweeping the net.

Create your own error message.

Don't have time to view the movies you want? No problem, hop over to Ultra Condensed Movies and get the drift in a jiffy.

Can you navigate this website without clicking?

Do you look like your dog? These people do.

No, not Tag Body Spray. One Colorado school has banned the game of tag. What's next? Red Rover? Four Square? Gym?

It's that time of year to head (back to) college. Excited freshman head off to the college for the first time.... even at 15 years old.

I hope they programmed it to say "help I've fallen and I can't get up!"

Google Earth gets another cool feature and now you can fly around in it. Could they be working on the next edition of Flight Simulator? Who knows, though seems they are working on a SecondLife like program called Third Life.

Ever wonder what your icons do when you go to sleep or leave the room? They have a desktop war.

Drunk man stumbles into courtroom. Good thing it wasn't Judge Judy's courtroom.

From the dark ages (APERNET) to the Myspace age(TEENAGE)take an enlighting journey through the history of the Internet.

Interesting marketing by 3M at bus shelters. Check out their new security glass promotion.

Once to steal the home owners possessions. Another time to return them and apologize.
Read story.

One of many bad songs. But it gets better with misheard lyrics.

A perfect close to summer. Seaside pictures.

An oldie but a goodie. The Sign Toucher's Club of America will not be visiting this one on their tour of “Signs 07” because the bridge is out.

Baby Hedgehogs brush new mother. Cute, yet sad.

How we use the web and how it uses us.

I've just spent a good chunk of time getting distracted with an engaging voting site I came across called Buzz Dash.

You can add your vote in real time to issues on many different topics. Interesting and strangely fun.

Follow up: Miss South Carolina Teen USA explains her answer. It happens to the best of us.

Evolution painted on a wall 1.1 MB